I either need to take some darn cooking classes or just (wo)man up and start making food that doesn't look completely unappetizing.
Andy loved this dish so much that he propped a huge plate of it on his chest and shoveled it directly into his mouth; no fork-lifting required. It's a Thai-inspired tofu and shrimp salad with plenty of vegetables and herbs, initially conceived as filling for a lettuce wrap.
Since I figured the shrimp would get sauce-logged anyway, I did them ceviche-style, marinating them in lime juice and soy sauce instead of cooking them. There was a little too much dressing overall, since due to an unfortunate ketchup-related accident (see below) I had to add a bunch more ingredients to get the taste I wanted; otherwise, this was fantastically delicious. In the future I will (in increasing order of importance) add some diced bell peppers, measure the ingredients I put in, and make much, much less dressing. If you want to use lettuce in this, fine, but it's utterly unnecessary.
1 lb tofu, cut into very small cubes and baked until just golden on the outside
1/2 lb shrimp, chopped
Fresh basil, preferably sweet basil
3 shredded carrots
1 (large) cucumber
Fresh minced ginger
Fresh minced garlic
Lime juice & lime zest
Ketchup (this was an accident [I thought it was sriracha], although chopped fresh tomatoes would have gone splendidly in this)
Sriracha (for real this time)
Peanuts or cashews, for garnish