Just stop, Alibris. We get it.

Alibris, which has brought me many a delightful and delightfully cheap book over the years, just won't stop sending me coupons. The trick is that to invoke my $10 coupon, I would have to spend $50, which is easy when you have books like this one, which I really want to read but which is un-checkoutable at Bobst and unavailable at the Strand, or this one, which I've got in PDF but which it might be good to have in hard copy because reading on the computer is basically inviting distractability, or even this one, which is just plain amusing. But spending that much money on books would be a bad idea, which is why Alibris needs to quit tempting me with the fact that there are many interesting tomes out there to be purchased via its enthusiastically worded coupon-containing e-mails.

Anyway, tonight was veggie burger night, using a brand new recipe*. These were the best I've ever cooked. Here's the list of alterations I made to the recipe:

1. I added a handful of chopped parsley right before giving the mix its final buzz in the food processor.
2. I used panko instead of regular breadcrumbs.
3. I processed the olives with the rest of the burger batter in order to disperse them better than I could by hand.
4. Although I only halved the recipe, I decreased the amount of thyme by 2/3. Anything more would have been overwhelming.
5. I put the lentils on earlier in the day and got distracted by something or other. By the time I remembered I had lentils on the stove, the bottom was scorched. I picked out the most charred ones and just threw in the remainder. Surprisingly enough, the small dose of "chipotle lentils" was a great substitute for liquid smoke; there weren't enough burnt ones to impart an acrid flavor, fortunately.

The coral-colored stuff is a Russian-esque dressing that I concocted using sour cream, sriracha, and pureed canned tomato with a bit of brown sugar (I don't have ketchup). I served the duly dressed burgers** on a pan-toasted slice of no-knead whole wheat bread with a lemon-and-olive oil-dressed green salad. These would be equally (or more) delicious on a traditional hamburger bun with a slice of tomato and some mayo, though. Now that I think of it, broiling cheddar on top during the last few minutes of cooking wouldn't go amiss either.

*Do I hate myself a little for using a recipe from a blog called Post Punk Kitchen? Yes. But this thing makes me feel better!
**This makes it sound like I'm actually presenting my food to people in the evenings, but do not be fooled. There's nothing more formal than "I suppose even though I'm eating alone in my room using a napkin and utensils would be a human thing to do" going on.